Elder mediators say their profession is growing as baby boomers seek help with their aging parents.
If you are dealing with some of the thorny family issues that often arise as loved ones age – such as disputes over inheritances, where an elderly parent may live, what type of care may be necessary, and who will pay for it – you are not alone. And if you think your family could use a “professional referee,” it may be time to consider consulting an “elder mediator.”
According to a recent Wall Street Journal article, elder mediators say their profession is growing as baby boomers seek help with their aging parents.
“Our clients tend to be well-educated, successful people who are used to hiring professionals for whatever services they need,” says Arline Kardasis, co-founder of Elder Decisions, a mediation and training firm in Norwood, MA.
Elder mediators can help clients resolve conflicts over a variety of issues, from how to share a cherished legacy property or vacation home, to who should drive Mom to her monthly doctor’s appointments.
There are many advantages to mediation, including of course, the potential to avoid family conflicts and relationship break-downs. But additionally, an objective third-party opinion, especially from a professional experienced in such matters, can help families find creative – and acceptable – solutions they might never have discovered on their own. The process also can be much less expensive than litigation.
The WSJ relates two important bits of advice, though. First, the elderly person in question should be party to the discussions, especially regarding issues of where they will live or how they will receive care. Second, keep in mind that mediation of this nature is not regulated and there are no basic standards or metrics to use in finding a mediator. If mediation is right for your family, then your family will have to do the leg-work to find someone who knows the industry, knows the problems, and understands your family. You will want to look for experience, follow up on references, and perhaps seek advice or referrals from a qualified elder law attorney.
Tags: aging parent, elder, elder law attorney, elder mediation, family conflicts, inheritance dispute, resolve conflicts